From fictional vampires to masked killers and morally questionable creatures, our attraction to monsters reveals a surprisingly human fantasy: being wanted without having to be perfect.
There is something deeply suspicious about the number of women who would happily let a fictional vampire ruin their lives. Give us a six-foot-tall monster with questionable morals, supernatural abilities and the emotional availability of a brick wall, and suddenly our dating standards have left the building.
Forget the emotionally mature man who communicates effectively. Sometimes, we want the creature lurking in the shadows to become inexplicably obsessed with us.
Welcome to the strange, seductive world of monster romance.
The appeal of being the exception
From brooding vampires and dangerous werewolves to tentacled creatures and masked horror villains, monsters have become unlikely objects of desire across books, films and internet fandoms. But what exactly makes something frightening suddenly feel irresistible?
Part of the appeal lies in the fantasy of being the exception. The monster might be feared by everyone else, but for some inexplicable reason, it chooses you. You are the one person who can see beneath its terrifying exterior, the only human capable of awakening its softer side.
It is the ultimate romantic ego boost: being so desirable that even a creature supposedly incapable of tenderness becomes devoted to you.
In real life, however, nobody should have to fix a partner, earn basic affection or prove they are special by tolerating frightening behaviour.
Danger, desire and the thrill of fiction
Monster romance also plays with the relationship between fear and excitement. Horror creates suspense, adrenaline and heightened anticipation, while erotic fantasy allows people to explore taboo scenarios from a position of imagination and control.
For some readers, the attraction is less about the monster itself and more about what it represents: power, mystery, forbidden desire or an escape from ordinary romantic expectations.
A supernatural lover does not have to navigate awkward first dates, leave you on read or announce that they are “not ready for anything serious”. Instead, the fantasy often centres on overwhelming desire and an intensity that conventional romance rarely delivers.
Of course, fantasies are personal. Enjoying a fictional scenario does not automatically mean wanting it in real life, and there is no single explanation for why someone finds monsters attractive.
When the red flags become fangs
Monster romance also turns familiar dating clichés upside down. Possessiveness becomes supernatural devotion, obsession becomes an epic love story, and the emotionally unavailable love interest suddenly has centuries of tortured backstory.
The appeal depends on the story's framing, but the distinction between fantasy and reality matters. Jealousy, coercion and controlling behaviour do not become healthy simply because a fictional character is attractive.
Perhaps the real fantasy is not being desired by something terrifying. It is being desired so completely that you never have to wonder whether you are wanted.
And if that devotion happens to come with fangs, claws and a suspiciously large collection of black capes? Well, fiction gives us room to indulge our strangest tastes without turning them into real-life relationship goals.
Because sometimes, the monster under the bed is considerably more exciting than the man who refuses to define the relationship.
Written by VavaViolet Magazine’s Founder and Editor-in-Chief, Sophie Blackman
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