Have you ever daydreamed about a life where men will do anything for you, even if you act like a brat? I have good news for you: some men have a fetish for high-maintenance, challenging women; they’re called Brat Tamers - they get off on Brats (no matter how naughty you are!)
Now, before I teach you the lifestyle of the Brat - because it is just that, a lifestyle - first you must know what one is exactly.
Sexually speaking, a Brat is a submissive partner in a BDSM dynamic who enjoys playfully teasing, provoking, and deliberately disobeying their dominant partner to elicit a reaction.
Instead of quietly following instructions, a Brat uses cheeky resistance, talks back, or breaks rules as a fun way to test limits and invite discipline or attention.
A Brat Tamer, the dominant, specialises in handling, controlling, and responding to a "Brat".
Ways to be a Brat/get what you want
- Tease them — give them a smug look when you know you're being cheeky.
- Talk back playfully — “Oh, you think you’re in charge now?”
- Pretend not to listen — especially when it’s clearly part of your established dynamic.
- Challenge them — “Make me.”
- Be deliberately difficult — playfully refuse a harmless request, then grin.
- Push their buttons — use an inside joke or something you know gets a reaction.
- Be cocky — act completely convinced you're getting away with everything.
- Fake innocence — “What? I didn't do anything.”
- Make them work for your cooperation — within whatever you've both agreed is fun.
- Escalate the teasing — start subtle and become progressively more mischievous.
- Break character to laugh — bratty dynamics can be playful rather than intensely serious.
- Know when to stop — a good brat knows the difference between playful resistance and ignoring an actual boundary.
The trick to getting a man to love it is to find a man who already loves it. I know you’re sighing, hoping I have some magic up my sleeve to change your man, but the truth is you can’t change someone unless they want to, and being a Brat Tamer isn’t for the faint-hearted.
Dealing with high-maintenance people is a full-time job when it comes to the bratting dynamic. While it should never feel like a task or unenjoyable, a Brat Tamer is pushed to their limits, as is a Brat when punished.
Not everyone is for the lifestyle; not everyone will want to spoil you.
So, how do you find men who love taming Brats? You straight up ask them.
“Hey, so I’m into this BDSM thing called Bratting. Are you into it or willing to try it?” That’s it; that is what it takes.
Over dinner, over coffee or between kissing, the latter ideally- is a good time to bring up the conversation.
While the above may seem bleak if your man isn’t much into the idea, there are things you can do as a woman to cheekily get your high-maintenance desires.
Dolling yourself up before you ask for something helps, as men are typically visual creatures.
As does batting your eyelashes, smiling with the whites of your teeth, and letting the light shine in your eyes.
It sounds manipulative because it is.
A big part of being a Brat is pushing those boundaries, and trust me, it’s thrilling but dangerous.
By VavaViolet Magazine's Founder and Editor-in-Chief, Sophie Blackman
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