The argument that having a sexual fantasy about someone else while in a relationship could be classed as cheating is heavily flawed, according to one VavaViolet Magazine reader.
As Sophie Blackman writes for 'Does fantasising about someone else make you a cheat? Let's debate...': "For others, just the thought of their partner, thinking about someone else, enhances their sexual pleasure.
"As much as we would all like to believe that we only have eyes for our partner and vice versa, science disagrees.
"After the honeymoon phase, the novelty of being so in love wears off, and reality kicks in."
I write this as a married man, sexual fantasies about other women (and sometimes men) have kept things in the bedroom exciting and pleasurable for both of us.
I will admit, I have fantasised about previous lovers, the one guy I had a secret relationship with in school, and even female friends I'd love to spend a night with - but would I ever do it in reality? No.
I came close, only once, but snapped out of it very quickly - this is human nature.
To expect someone to never even bat an eyelid at another person, be it in reality or fantasy, is a level of despotic behaviour that never ends well.
Be honest, everyone has watched porn of some kind... is that not the same thing, just visualised?
And hey, maybe if you're open about it, it could lead to a new level in your relationship, one where you could potentially live out your fantasies, and everyone gets to try new things - or if not, at least you've been open about it.
We all have a little sexualised part of ourselves that's held down or stifled. If fantasising about someone else helps to ease that, then who is anyone to judge?
Written by an anonymous VavaViolet Magazine reader.
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